Tuesday, April 24, 2012

A Sandi Update


Sandi’s port was checked today after we had concern over the way it was acting and the way she felt with it.  It was time for the monthly flush out anyway so they did that and took a look at things. We are told everything is okay and the symptoms she has been feeling the last few days with it are normal.  Tonight the port is hurting her pretty good as it always does after they access it and do anything so hopefully that will back off in a few days.

Her next appointment as it stands now is next Tuesday, May 1 when she is supposed to have her PET Scan. Then on May 4 we are back to see the doctor to find out what the results of the scan are and where we go from here treatment.  Sandi remains convinced that she is going to beat this damn thing. But, again today while we were waiting for her port to be worked on, we saw somebody who had a much better prognosis back in December when this all started who is now going into hospice tomorrow as the chemo just didn’t work.  That raises the number of folks we directly know to eight who had much better chances of beating what they were dealing with than anyone thought for a second Sandi did.

Believe me, I want to be positive this is all going to work out even if being positive is so not in my nature. But, they told me on Thanksgiving Day she would be gone by this June. I can’t get that out of my head. I have hard time believing she is winning the battle between what I know and what I see.  For every good day she has, she does too much and then suffers horribly for the next several days. Whether the overall trend is going up or down I don’t know. It is all a blur and all way too much.

On behalf of all of us I just want to say thank you again to all those who have donated. It means a lot to us and we very much appreciate it. As you can see over on the “Chip In” widget we are still very far from the goal. Hopefully, we will make it one more time.  Please know that we are not wasting your donations. I promise you we are only doing what we absolutely have to do in order to hold things together here as long as we can. We are truly grateful for your help and it means so much to all of us.

Please keep us in your thoughts, your prayers and your wishes…..

Kevin

9 comments:

  1. You guys are definitely in our thoughts. I know how Sandi's feeling on the port. I had one in for a time a few years back.

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  2. She is very frustrated with it. They told her she would "get used to it" but it still is bothering her now just as much as it was when they put it in back in November.

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  3. For quite some time, Kevin--through 4MA--I've been following your family's ordeal with concern and prayers. I'm just not the sort that feels comfortable bringing up that sort of thing on such a public forum. But when I read your blog today I felt I had to say something to let you you know you are in my prayers. In fact, I'm off to town now to light a candle for Sandi. God bless you both.

    Jeff

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  4. My fingers were a bit stiff this morning, Kevin. I, of course, meant to type MMA (not 4MA) and DorothyL.

    Jeff

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  5. I wish I could donate some more, but the cash flow is always a concern around here. God is in control and in charge, so don't let someone else's results affect your mind-set. Sandi has the best mind-set that anyone could have! We are praying for you out here. (Also hoping--on an unrelated note--that you got the file of my book MARFA LIGHTS etc. intact and might be able to read it sometime. I am now in negotiations with a small press in NYC for that one, although they don't do e-pub and I would still maintain the Kindle version. Cool.)

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  6. Thank you, Jeffrey. I'm not comfortable with bringing it up in public any of it either. But, when I started asking for people to help, it seemed to me that I had a duty to go full disclosure on everything.

    And thank you, Jeffrey.

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  7. Thank you, Shalanna. I'm convinced her mindset is what has kept her going. In the beginning, she was so sick and basically out of it even when awake that she didn't understand how serious things were and didn't know all the details. Even once she did know, she was always convinced that she was going to beat this thing.

    I hope she is right. I am counting on it. I can't bear the other.

    As to the book----I don't know. I will look for it. I am overwhelmed and exhausted.

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  8. I'm so sorry, Kevin, that you are so worn out. I'm keeping you and Sandi in my prayers. You are so generous when it comes to others. I wish there was more I could do for you. I'm sorry.

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  9. Thank you, Lesa, for everything.

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