Sunday Sample features Barry this week with
an excerpt from his book A Whimsical is
a Popsicle of The Mind
(available only in a Kindle edition).
JAGUARMOCKY
by Barry Ergang
’Twas
buick, and the slicky tires
Did
squeal and wobble on the road.
All audi
were the first-time buyers
Whom the
salesmen outsnowed.
“Beware
the Jaguarmock, you podge!
The
clutch that grinds, the engine fartin’!
Abhor
the Yugo bird, and dodge
The
vroomiest Aston-Martin!”
He took
his volvo wrench in
hand:
Long
time ferrari foe his fear—
Thus
idled he ’neath the Hyundai tree,
And sat
there out of gear.
And, as
in lexus thought he sat,
The
Jaguarmock, its horn a-bloogin’,
Chryslered
up the porsche flat
And
bellowed, “Fahrvergnugen!”
A twist!
A twirl! And with a whirl
The
volvo wrench went ponty-ack.
He bent
and took hood ornament,
And
studebakered back.
“Hast
thou totaled, then, the Jaguarmock?
Come get
a hug, my beemer boy!
O
fordjous day! Cadlack coopay!”
He
saabed with packard joy.
’Twas
buick, and the slicky tires
Did
squeal and wobble on the road.
All audi
were the first-time buyers
Whom the
salesmen outsnowed.
—Originally published in Maelstrom, Vol. III, Issue 2, 2000
Barry
Ergang ©2014
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